Man the Lord is teaching me a lot! He is truly breaking my heart for this world and for the people who are in it. A great deal of the heartbreak is for my students and the hard times they are experiencing and the other is just the own struggles I am feelings. Eli is now 10 months old and that means we are approaching the year anniversary of the day he was born as well as the day that I almost died.
It brings up so much emotion. I was watching the Today show and they asked a guest what their life was like and if they were able to function on a normal level after a heart transplant. Her answer was that she "lived a more full life than most because she has experienced the fragility of life." I am trying to remember this daily. I am not so much like Tim McGraw and his skydiving and rocky mountain climbing, but I do want to live a full life. Full of forgiveness, grace, joy, peace, love, and integrity.
This year I have two small groups of girls and in one of them we are going through spiritual disciplines. In the last two weeks we have talked about Gratitude and Celebration. I came up with the idea to send them "grateful grapes". They were green paper grapes. On the back I wrote that life is often like a green grape, bitter and sour but we choose to be grateful and celebrate. I have it posted on my bedroom mirror with a list of things I am grateful for. It is a daily reminder of all that I have. Even with that I am still brought down by sadness, frustration, annoyance and my irritation. It is hard to stay joyful all the time, but I am working to do it as much as possible. I have far more than I deserve.
I hope that by reading this you are reminded of your grateful grapes and the things that fill your life with happiness. I recommend listing them in a place that you see regularly. It helps.